Thursday, April 29, 2010

to the thoughts and emotions of Spoken Wizdom i reply

if a door was shut
a shattered window could be an escape.
if I were too caught up
it is possible that I could become more entangled within snares and darnels.
if I made a wrong turn
would I be lost on an aimless path forever?
if I was gone
how would I go?
if I had so much to give
what kind of person would I be?
if I was blind
would I still see?
if I was lying
would I get caught?
if I age
will I die?
if I cry
would I be sad?
if I was chained
would I be an animal?
if my mind wandered
would I think of you?
if my past was gloomy
would I be resilient?
if I was standing
would I still be short?
If I love
would I let it show?
appealing to the thoughts and emotions of Spoken Wizdom
there is so much left unsaid. There is the pity of ourselves as well as the known- that we are pithy.
as the nights grow darker and the skies get colder, my mind is opened and my thoughts are clearer.
I never have the words, and you know this, and it is eating me up. But you, expressions come natural. For you it is like lava flowing. For me it is like a short circuit. as the wires wear and use, they tether, like tassels, they flare, they crack, they break,
and then maybe
I seem silent.
On an imaginary and imagery basis there is a communal mind between the two of us.
Sometimes and all times, on a spiritual level, if one looks within the soul, words are unnecessary.
You already know what I know.


What is inward?

I live in the universe, this universe I live in, is this inward?

There are other universes, other quadrants, other beings, are these inward?

Our galaxy, this solar system, our lovely planet, Earth...


A dark mixed one of my gender in this hemisphere on this sphere.

Tell me. What is inward?


How about the bras on my bed, the panties on my chair, the books on my floor, the crumpled papers, the rolling papers? Is this inward?


And what about my innards?


My siddur, my chumash, my serferim, to me, these are inward. My soul. It is inward.


How about my thoughts that I share? And what about the ones that I do not? What about the vibe that I give off.


What about the comfort I bring? What about those I neglect because I just cannot always deal.


And there are things you just do not get. There are the things I misinterpret. ALWAYS, actually. This is definitely inward.


My secrets, definitely inward. And also these are outward. Everyone knows every secret I have, I have told them all, except for one. Does this make me open? Because I know how and when to drop a line like it is nothing so that it can be easily overlooked.



Parshas Bereishis and Talmid Johanan

in the beginning was God

and God was the word

and the word was with me

and nothing that is within me was not from God

and there is nothing within me that what not from God and that was not with God from the beginning

because it was the beginning that began and nothing began that did not begin